Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Do you regret?

I don’t understand when people say “I have no regrets.” Because, personally I feel that we cannot be truly without regrets. Those viscous dregs of regrets remain stuck at the bottom of our hearts no matter how much we try to deny it. Or scrub it away, for that matter.
The unobtained, the undone in our lives. Remembrances of things we loved once but learned - or had to learn- to live without.
The cherished project abandoned due to certain factual specifications that did not fit into our current lives (and by the time they did we were too disheartened to go back to them)
That hobby, art that one could not pursue and kept postponing until the desire died down.

Regrets caused by lovers who chose to live without us. Regrets caused by lovers who chose to live with us.

The love I couldn’t return. The loving gesture that died in the hesitation of ‘many second thoughts’. The love that I was afraid to express and the person moved on. The romance I allowed to slip away because real life came in between. The love I couldn’t express enough, while my parents were still living.
The friends I trusted and was betrayed. The enemies whom I did not trust would truly harm me, and they did.

The list goes on...

And- I envy you, when you say, “I have no regrets.”


Last night you wrote your sonnets in  Braille: the commas, parenthesis, ellipses engraved perfectly on my skin- and  I  ...